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Okay, what the fuck.
Sep. 21st, 2008 10:22 pmI hate this. I hate not feeling safe in my own apartment, I hate not knowing what I'm afraid of.
Most of you probably know cause I probably freaked out to you that last night my door blew open...like, it was totally closed, unlocked, and then suddenly it opened, really considerably violently, like it wasn't just swinging open in the wind. It was like someone started to come in and then stopped 8 inches into opening the door, it just stopped. I said "hello??" and ran up to see who was there and there was no-one. Then, tonight, at around the same time, I heard banging, I think it might have been on my door, either that or the one next to it, but either way I'm so creeped out and I don't even know what I'm nervous of.
It's stupid, I feel like I'm being haunted which is the worst feeling in the world because I don't WANT to believe in the occult, I don't WANT to believe in haunting but the truth remains that I'm gullible and this all really does make me feel really nervous and scared. And it sucks, because I have no way of battling against it, I don't even know if there's anything to battle against but this is the second night in a row and I TOTALLY HATE feeling like this, feeling a sense of unease and I can't make it go away.
Just in general I've been feeling kind of off lately but my apartment has always been the place where I could just chill out, hang around online and do nothing and now it just...it feels vaguely not-safe, my mind is no longer at ease. I hate it so much. It makes me want to be back home, not 3,000 miles from everything, from my old cozy room that didn't make me feel this way. I'm such a sissy. Even when this sort of thing happens only in movies and stuff it still makes me so scared so in real life it is taking away my concentration from things that need to get done.
I'm such a coward and a loser but I just want it to stop. Leave me alone. Of all the problems I have in my life right now, YOU are the one I don't need. Go away Haunt someone else who is brave enough to deal with it.
Most of you probably know cause I probably freaked out to you that last night my door blew open...like, it was totally closed, unlocked, and then suddenly it opened, really considerably violently, like it wasn't just swinging open in the wind. It was like someone started to come in and then stopped 8 inches into opening the door, it just stopped. I said "hello??" and ran up to see who was there and there was no-one. Then, tonight, at around the same time, I heard banging, I think it might have been on my door, either that or the one next to it, but either way I'm so creeped out and I don't even know what I'm nervous of.
It's stupid, I feel like I'm being haunted which is the worst feeling in the world because I don't WANT to believe in the occult, I don't WANT to believe in haunting but the truth remains that I'm gullible and this all really does make me feel really nervous and scared. And it sucks, because I have no way of battling against it, I don't even know if there's anything to battle against but this is the second night in a row and I TOTALLY HATE feeling like this, feeling a sense of unease and I can't make it go away.
Just in general I've been feeling kind of off lately but my apartment has always been the place where I could just chill out, hang around online and do nothing and now it just...it feels vaguely not-safe, my mind is no longer at ease. I hate it so much. It makes me want to be back home, not 3,000 miles from everything, from my old cozy room that didn't make me feel this way. I'm such a sissy. Even when this sort of thing happens only in movies and stuff it still makes me so scared so in real life it is taking away my concentration from things that need to get done.
I'm such a coward and a loser but I just want it to stop. Leave me alone. Of all the problems I have in my life right now, YOU are the one I don't need. Go away Haunt someone else who is brave enough to deal with it.
