hmmm so, i've been in vancouver for coming on three years now, and i still haven't made friends like the friends i have in tucson. but that, i accept, is probably because i never will. and not so much because of me, but because i can't imagine ever finding such people twice. that's because, coming out of high school, i found in my close friends a deep friendship that i can only really liken to true love. i mean, i don't expect to find that again. i have a few friends here in vancouver who i know have that- that deep friendship, and seeing them interact with each other sends pangs of nostalgia to me, but, well, so it goes.

i would say it's curious to me to imagine tucson from the perspective of wishing to be somewhere else except that i also miss vancouver, and when i go to tucson, i may be just as homesick for canada. although, still, it won't be the same sort of incontrollable, deep homesick that comes of history and engrained smiles and smells and sights.

the best way to make friends is to just figure out how to live without them, and then become interested in the people around you. i know it's hard. i know.. i've been there, and i'm still there even now, even with lots of good acquaintances and some really close friends who i care dearly for, here in vancouver, sometimes i still feel the emptiness.

do an art project! spend some time walking with yourself and just listening to the things whistling around in your heart and mind that you would like to be telling your close friends. just sort of hold yourself.

okay one last thing that's helped me. don't think about what strangers/potential friends see in you, think about what you see in them. what you like about them. don't know? ask them, spend time with them, get to know them.

sorry for rambling so much.. i've been thinking about this a lot lately too. i hope it turns out well for you!